May 31, 2013

Dear Old-Married-Uncle,

While I appreciate the attention you are recently bestowing upon me even as it-creeps-me-out-a-little-bit, I would like to point out a few pertinent facts before we proceed any further. When I met you a few weeks ago, courtesy our mutual friend, I thought you were charming, if a little-too-obviously-philandering man with an admirably vicious sense of humor I quite enjoyed. I recognize that you were, as so many of us are, not quite satisfied with your life but determined to make the most of it. You have lived longer than I have, achieved considerably more and are well set in your wealthy-businessman-lifestyle. I enjoyed the few hours I spent in your company and considered your acquaintance well met.

What I enjoyed most about our impromptu coffee-meet-up, however, was not the conversation (which, I admit was amusing) or the food (good, as it was), but rather it was the opportunity to meet your very interesting, somewhat complicated (in the intriguing kind of way) and rather nice looking younger (and single) brother. And while I am generally an easy-to-get-to-know kinda person, I suspect that now might be the best time to tell you that my only motivation in the facebook be-friending and the happy responding to text-messages etc. was all springing from a rather genuine desire to get to know your sibling a little better.

What has transpired, unfortunately, is that the brother-figure seems to have been completely removed from the equation and for the past few days I have become the unwilling recipient of the philandering-ways-of-old-married-you. Which, let me tell you, was so-totally-NOT-the-plan.

Oh-well. Epic Fail. Pity that.

And on that note, pliss to be stop hitting on me now. Won't work, now or pretty much ever. Sorry 'bout that.  Okay thanks bye.

Much love (to your brother),


1 comment:

riddleinninesyllables said...

Made me smile a big smile. Thank you again. :-)