I, for one, am extremely annoyed that none of the above is true. Having been in a similar situation twice before (thank you Boid, and thank you N) but in the position of the breaker-upee, I have justifiably spent time wallowing in self-pity, feeling miserable and blaming the other party for being the worst kind of ass. I am used to that role, and I feel like I handle it with great dignity and pride (or whatever the most graceful tearful equivalent is).
Now, in the unfortunate position of the breaker-upper, I find that I have nowhere to go. And no one to blame but myself. And self-blame is my least of all non-favorite things. I can't run crying to mommy, because the hurt is self-inflicted. I can't wish that he would re-consider and take me back, because the decision was mine and it would be stupid in the extreme to do that. I can't wish awful things happened to him as a result of all the pain he's causing me because, well, I don't want awful things to happen to him and because it's not him that's causing the pain - well not anymore at any rate.
So here I am. I took the decision. I had the conversation. I said goodbye.
And now I hurt just as much as I did before, except he's not here to be a convenient scapegoat for my pain.
Explain to me - those of you who know better than I - how THIS was the right solution to my dilemma?