September 11, 2010


So many days
in so many ways
I quite detest
my extended family

I wonder why they have nothing better to do than pick on me just because I don't wear a ring with a diamond the size of a peanut. And I don't have a cute baby for them to traumatize as they gush over it. Or an ugly husband with a meddling mother-in-law who they can talk about over tea. Or why they feel the need to keep announcing - in the most mincing of tones - that they're 'praying for me'.

Is it any surprise that after an encounter with the not-so-near-or-dear I feel like the last-kid-in-the-playground? You know, the fat one in the corner that nobody wants to play with? The one who gets picked last for everything and that also because the other team has no choice (because if they did, they wouldn't pick me). I often wonder if I really did do everything wrong, and that it's true, there really is no one out there for me. And I will have to, as dadi fears, settle for the one-nobody-else-wants. Or even worse, the one-who-has-no-choice-but-to-settle-for-me.

20 comments:

Vagabond said...

I actually do not mind being called a creeper. But I really think these shaadi-posts are damn interesting:P

The thought just crossed my head. Once you get old, bored with life and annoying for your teenage kids, you can compile these particular posts into a book that you could perhaps name 'Xebilicious Marriage Escapades'and turn it into a best-seller.

P.S No pun intended. Promise. Promise. I am so sarcastic otherwise that when I try to sound sincere, it never comes out right.

Vagabond said...

Now coming to your post, I think you should give in to your dadi's arranged marriage plan before you turn 30.

I plan to do the same, but considering I am a chinioty (people from chiniot, with sole purpose in life to make money, and also get married so they could pass on their Jewish, parsimonious genes as soon as possible), I might end up doing the same before even I reach 28.

Xeb said...

Sigh. Fine, unless I find a better alternative I hereby resolve to say yes to anyone who proposes to me in my 29th year. *sigh*

Xeb said...

But, the ever-present fear: What if nobody does? :(

Vagabond said...

Umm...find a safety-back-up. Probably, some one in college or someone you know who drooled/es over you. You see, our consideration-set gets wider with our age.

I am a little lucky in this case. No matter how ugly I am by 28, mommy will find me a pretty, innocent little girl in distant relatives, so she could get pretty grand children.(one of the chnioty-perks)Hehe.

Vagabond said...

To add to that, a girl who could make a tag-team with mommy to make me quit smoking. This is the only thing she dreams about lately. Bas!

Xeb said...

Pakistani men (Chinioti or otherwise) have that luxury. Unfortunately, women in this country do not! :P

But lets see what happens in the next two years. Shall we?

Vagabond said...

Which tells me you're in the dangerous red-area of twenty-something already. Good luck with all your nuptial endeavors : )

Xeb said...

Or I could just as easily not get married at all and move to another country! :P *simple-dimple*

*hehe*

Vagabond said...

And simply-dimply turn into a social-pariah, in your extended family at least. With mums giving your example to their daughters of a girl who because of her 'nakhras' got old and now too old to get into the 'bandhan-of-marriage' so she sought marriage-asylum to foreign lands.

P.S. Don't you think I am wasting my time in brand management? Shouldn't I be writing spice-it-up family-plays for HUM TV?

Xeb said...

Haha! You're definitely not a very reassuring commenter. Should you not be on my side here? :P

Vagabond said...

Haina? If I were to choose sides, I'd go with dadi. Hands down. Muahaha:P

Call me old-fashioned, I support her vehemently. I say, why not? One good reason as to why you shouldn't in a year or two?

Xeb said...

Err, maybe because no one (who I want to marry) is asking me to marry them. When he does, I shall agree. Until then, I can only whine about it, and put up with the crap everyone seems only-too-delighted to throw at me.

Vagabond said...

Good to know that people who you want to marry actually exist and have been shortlisted. I have none. Taken as a legit reason. I'd leave you alone now:P

Xeb said...

Haha, well I assume they've got to exist. Somewhere. :P

And thank you. I've had quite enough of the 'M' word to last me a while now...

DOC said...

girl! i was literally gasping reading your post! esp the last to be picked at the playground. i was born and raised in the west- so there is still some political correctness in a social setting. my eids in pakistan, on the other hand, are plain dreadful. i wish i could duct tape the mouths of all extended fam members. nthg is good enough for these ppl. and the loser chic whose sole purpose in life is to appease these ppl seems like has a cult of

doc said...

propaganda in her favor. sorry my ranting comment. but u took the words out of my mouth. i just had to say- i know exactly how u feel!

Lonely Perverted Soul said...

Hey i need to get engaged tooo.... I wana remove my first name.... :P
And good luck with everything and Eid Mubarik... Find someone in the Eid gatherings.. :P

PehlaykaNataa said...

hey i feel like killing you

if you KNOW who you want to marry, then WHY are you waiting for him to propose...

you give one thousand reasons to not be old fashioned and then act soooooo old fashioned...

remember racheal of Friends...kuch seekho...dont wait

idiot

I said...

Awesome writing there! My third super-blog discovery of the day so far!