March 20, 2009

Xeb's 15-Step Formula for Recovery from Romantic Disasters

  1. Find your friends. Tell them the story. Notice how it keeps getting funnier with each re-telling. Laugh

  2. Go for an impromptu trip out of town with friends who make you smile. Smile.

  3. Look at the sea. Promise yourself a lazy, lazy beach trip as soon as the weather improves. Plan.

  4. Immerse yourself in lots of bling-bling and the unadulterated, gaudy glamor of sparkling, colorful casinos. Look at rooms, after rooms of sheer decadence. Enjoy.

  5. Try your hand at roulette (the non-Russian kind). Win and realize your luck may not be as bad as you think. Reflect.

  6. Buy half-a-pound of sour-sugar-candy from a store where you can make your own candy bag by digging into barrels of different sugary sweets. Experience the joys of a sugar-high as you walk along the wooden boardwalk arm-in-arm with friends you love. Feel at peace.

  7. Play real poker with real people, and real money, on real tables, in a real casino, like a real gambler. Be thrilled. Lose. Realize the cliche suddenly makes sense: it's not about winning or losing, it's really all about how you play the game. Feel content.

    (On a side note, realize also that virtual is usually always bogus. Without the sensory reality of 'life'in the equation, no major decisions should ever be made. Feel a little stupid.)

  8. Eat greasy, cheesy, yummy french fries in freezing weather huddled in the dubious shelter of a revolving door. Feel silly.

  9. Enjoy a full-body massage delivered by a professional masseuse at a body-therapy clinic. Feel relaxed.

  10. Eat good, good food. Feel happy.

  11. Walk across Manhattan in borrowed socks lent to you by your (now-sockless) friend because your shoes make your feet hurt, and it's too cold to go barefoot. Feel loved.

  12. Be part of the audience for America's Got Talent. Realized, America really does have talent. But so do you. Feel motivated.

  13. Bond, over a meal far-far overdue, with a friend. Feel positive.

  14. Go shopping. Buy something beautiful, impractical and expensive to wear. Feel pampered.

  15. Indulge in chocolate crepes draped in strawberries and blackberries with whipped cream on top. Feel complete.


heewa said...

okay, xeb? :)

i will also lend you my socks. promise. :)

Ali said...

munafik munafik!

too much un-islamic stuff in here, i shall go call my talibani uncles!

Xeb said...

Heewa: Thank you! :D

Ali: Don't bother. I apparently got rejected because I'm not 'Islami' enough. I think your Taliban uncles have done their worst already. Sigh.

Ali said...

oops. ouch. um. hugs?

Xeb said...

Na, na. After spending more-time-than-he-was-worth reflecting on past life decisions, have realized that islaami demands are highly overrated! :P